Bathing with the Enemy
by CoriWhoWritesStuff
Summary: A late-night encounter between Snape and Lupin. In the bath. My apologies for the title. Mild SSRL.


Notes: This is for fun. Rated M only for the naughty words and some innuendo. I really like this one for some reason... hmmm. 

**Bathing with the Enemy**

Remus Lupin was walking down a fifth floor corridor, headed for the prefect's bathroom. It was close to midnight, so he shouldn't really be out this late, but all the cleaning spells he knew hadn't been enough to get rid of the sticky white substance that was still spread over places on his body he probably didn't want to think about.

_Not fair of them all to gang up on me at once like that_, he thought to himself as he neared the bathroom door. They may have been celebrating the end of exams, but doing something like that to him without warning him first... completely unfair. He hadn't even had time to prepare himself beforehand.

Noticing an amount of the gooey stuff he had somehow missed on the inner side of his elbow, he scraped off a gob with one finger and stuck it in his mouth. At least it wasn't bad. As far as marshmallow creme went, anyway.

"Pine-fresh," he whispered to the door, which swung open for him. Now to get this mess off

Lupin froze, definitely seeing what was before him, yet not quite wanting to believe it. It was Severus Snape.

One of his fellow prefects, of course, but that wasn't what was so surprising. Considering the hour, and the fact that the words "bath" and "Snape" didn't seem to go together, and all that. Snape seemed similarly frozen, a hand on the opening of his trousers, shirt already off.

"Oh, more company. Never get much this late at night." That was the mermaid portrait on the wall, but neither boy paid any attention to it.

"Er... hello, Snape," Lupin said awkwardly, not sure what else there was TO say. At that point Snape let loose a flood of swearwords, an absolute tidal wave of obscenities. Lupin flinched. The mermaid covered her ears.

Snape was almost as talented at swearing as he was at hexes, being able to awe other boys, set girls to crying, and on at least one occasion that Lupin had seen, cause even someone like Professor MacGonagall to actually blanch.

When he had run down what seemed like his entire vocabulary of nasty epithets, Snape finally stopped, panting. Lupin shifted from one foot to another. "You know, a 'hello' in return would have done fine."

"For fuck's sake, Lupin," Snape spat out. "What are you doing here? And where's the rest of your little gang? This had better not be some kind of stupid prank, because if it is, I..."

"Hold it!" Lupin interrupted, spreading his hands out in front of him. "This isn't a prank. I'm just here for a bath. No need to get shirty with me."

Snape continued to stare at him suspiciously. "What's that on your arm?"

"The reason I'm taking a bath. My mates thought it would be clever to give ME the exploding chocolates filled with marshmallow creme. Of course, they all went off at the same time, and..." Lupin shrugged, feeling rather lame. Snape smirked at him.

"Oh, of course." He went on to look away while muttering something that included the word "ponce"; Lupin pursed his lips slightly but chose to ignore it.

"What are YOU doing here then?"

"I thought I was taking a bath, but now that YOU'RE here..." Snape had grabbed his shirt and was preparing to put in on, but Lupin shook his head.

"Why not? There's plenty of room for both of us. The bath's huge." He waved a hand at it, and grinned. "If you like, we can stay on opposite sides." Snape bit at his lip, clearly considering. Lupin edged nearer the door, preventing escape.

"Oh, bloody... FINE. But you're turning around while I take my clothes off."

"Why? We're both boys, right? What have you got that I don't?"

"TURN. AROUND."

Lupin sighed. Levity didn't work with Snape, as he had plainly forgotten. He turned obligingly, listening to the rustle of the other boy removing his clothes, the soft slap of feet against the tile floor, and watery ripple as he slipped into the bathtub. "Alright then?" Lupin asked.

"Whatever," he heard Snape reply before he turned around with another grin.

"Now, YOU face the wall while I get in." It had been meant teasingly, but Snape turned around anyway, folding his arms and undoubtedly glaring at the wall behind him. Lupin shrugged and stripped down quickly, climbing into the opposite end of the tub. The water was already heated perfectly, and it felt wonderful against his bare skin. "You can turn around now."

"Who says I want to."

"Suit yourself." Lupin started down along the edge of the bath, examining the taps and trying to remember which contained his favourite kind of bubble bath. Snape had turned around slightly, and was watching him through narrowed eyes.

"What are you doing."

"Trying to... ah, here we are." It wasn't what he had been looking for, but he remembered that the tap with the rubies on the handle poured out large quatities of pink bubbles, and Snape was being rather rude to him, so...

He turned the handle, oddly pleased by the look of disgust that crossed the Slytherin's thin face. But then he mumbled something that only clearly contained the words "nancy boy", and it was Lupin's turn to frown. He set to washing himself clean of every bit of marshmallow, feeling relieved to at least not be sticky anymore. Then he stayed where he was, leaning against the side of the bath and just looking at Snape.

"What the hell are you doing? You're done, right? You can go."

"I'd like to soak a little longer, if it's all the same to you."

"It isn't. Can't you at least move back to your end?"

"Nah. Thought you might want to talk." Lupin couldn't think of the reason he was doing this, beyond maybe that he had some kind of repressed death wish. Now that he had started though, it seemed he couldn't stop.

"TALK," Snape was saying, bitterly. "Yes, of course. What would I have to talk about with YOU?"

"Oh, I don't know. Maybe why you're here, taking a bath at midnight?"

"None of your business, is it?"

"Are you afraid of being seen? Have you"

"He's not small," the mermaid offered all of a sudden. "I looked. And with the size of his nose, you know what they s..."

She obviously thought she was being helpful, but Snape didn't seem to think so. "Shut your damn mouth, you stupid bint!" he hissed at her.

"Why I NEVER," she huffed, turning her back on them both. Lupin was about to laugh before he noticed how the other boy was scowling hard at a remaining clump of pink bubbles, spots of colour staining his otherwise sallow cheeks.

"You really DON'T like to be seen," Lupin remarked softly.

"No, I don't." There was a bite to Snape's words, a kind of raw anger that took the Gryffindor slightly aback. "Besides that, you know what they say about me. That I never... wash myself. Well, I do. ...Sometimes. And I hate it when everyone remarks so loudly over it when I do, so I have to come here when there won't be anyone else to ridicule me. Likeyou're sure to start doing any minute."

Lupin had never expected Snape to volunteer so much information. But now he understood. "I'm sorry," he said quietly, thinking that to be the right thing to say in such a situation.

Snape only sneered at him. "Oh, I'll bet you are. And now you'll say, 'I understand, because I'm a hideous beast too, we can relate to each other'. Well, you can just save it, because"

"Hold on. Neither of us is a hideous beast, Severus."

"Oh, really. I knowyou're a werewolf, a horrible dark creature who wants me dead anyway." Lupin winced at these words, then felt his own face begin to heat up in anger. It had been over a year since the incident at the Shrieking Shack, but no matter how often he had tried to explain to Snape that he had had no part in it, he just couldn't break through the Slytherin's stubborn resolve that he HAD.

"Don't bring that up, that has no part in any of this. Besides, I've lost count of how many times I'vetold you..."

"Oh, come off it, Lupin! You hate me as much as your friends do. And you're always so weak-willed and poncy, never standing up for anything that might make people dislike you..."

"Boys, maybe you should calm down..." the mermaid interjected.

"Shut up!" they both yelled in unison.

"Right then," Snape continued as though never interrupted. "So why don't you show some backbone sometime, grow some balls, do something you actually want..."

At that point, Lupin stopped listening. He was at least as angry now as Snape was, maybe angrier. Here he was trying to be NICE and RESPECTFUL to the prat when he had been embarrassed, and he was being treated like dirt in return, called names and talked about in a derogatory fashion, even if some of it was true. So when Snape said "do something you actually want", he decided to take the advice.

Slowly he began to trudge his way toward Snape, the only reason for his speed being that the water hit him about mid-chest. Otherwise he would have gone much faster toward the enfuriating git. Snape finally noticed this and stopped his ranting, eyes widening.

"Lupin, what are you doing? Don't come any closer to me! I'm... I'm warning you!" He acted angry, but he was plainly scared, and as Lupin advanced even nearer, he backed away until he was at the corner of the bath, putting his hands up on the edge as though to hoist himself out. Then he seemed to remember he was naked, and froze stock-still, face colouring once more. "Lupin, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?" he repeated.

"Something I actually want to," Lupin replied.

"What's... that..."

"Shutting your mouth." Snape made to cover his head with his arms, obviously afraid that Lupin would hit him, but as he came within range, he reached out to pull them away, at the same time pulling the wiry Slytherin closer to him.

Their mouths came together hard, and Snape was much too shocked to struggle. To be truthful, Lupin was a little shocked as well. He HAD fancied the other boy in the past, even though he knew how hopeless that was, especially after last year. This was either the single bravest thing he had ever done, or the most stupid.

"Ooooh," said the mermaid. Neither of them heard.

When they finally broke apart, Snape just stared at him, mouth hanging open. His next attempt at speech wasn't very coherent.

"Lupin... what... you... why... _fuck_..."

"Shut up, Severus. Just shut up." Lupin let go of his arms, instead placing his hands, fingers outspread, on the sides of Snape's face. He kissed the other boy again, softly this time, allowing himself to fully enjoy the feel of those thin lips against his own. If he was going to be stupid, he might as well go all out with it. And after awhile, Snape was actually kissing him back.

Lupin knew he had wanted this. He really had. It was something he had _always _wanted, and he felt good taking it now.

Snape pulled away suddenly, and Lupin respectfully retreated a few paces, not wanting to push it too far. Unsure of what to do with his arms now that he was away from Snape, he just put them at his sides, feeling awkward.

"That was what you wanted?" Snape sounded incredulous, and Lupin didn't blame him.

"Yes."

"I didn't... know."

"That's because you never stop behaving like a prat long enough to listen to me. And I really don't appreciate you being so rude when I was TRYING to understand, you know."

"I... I'm sorry." Snape actually had the grace to look ashamed. Lupin's eyebrows nearly hit the roof.

"_You're sorry_?"

"Yes! Don't make me repeat myself," Snape grumbled. His face had taken on a pinkish tone again. "But this doesn't make me a... a flaming poofter, like YOU, or anything."

"A flaming... Severus, really. That's what you think of me? What about you, you kissed me back!"

"That was... nothing. I hated it." But he wouldn't make eye contact, and Lupin knew otherwise. He smiled, strangely pleased. "Now if you don't mind, I'm going to bed. Turn around."

"But"

"And another thing, Lupin, once we're out of this room, tonight might as well have never happened. Are we clear on that? When I leave, I'm going back to hating you again. Understand?"

"Oh, of course."

"...Get that stupid grin off your face. Turn around."

Lupin sighed again and did as he was told. Some things about Snape would never change. But he did have the courage to sneak a glance over his shoulder in time to see the other boy toweling off with his back to Lupin, providing a splendid view of slender legs and a surprisingly well-formed arse. As long as the night "might as well have never happened" once he left, what could it hurt?

A giggle abruptly echoed through the room, causing both boys to start. "I saw that."

Snape whirled around angrily, quite forgetting to cover himself and providing yet another splendid view of something else entirely.

And the mermaid had been right.

It took awhile for them to leave after that, what with Snape feeling the need to thoroughly curse both Lupin AND the portrait all over again. But it was safe to say that when they finally departed, neither of them managed to fully erase that night from their memories.


End file.
